Judge A Book

Stacy spent her days the centre of male attention.

She wore mini skirts and heels. She “got off” with most of the boys in her class. I used to think her a slut. A bitch. An attention whore. Little did I know that her mother taught her that the only way to do well in life as a woman, was to be the most beautiful and to marry a rich man - no matter how they treat you. Her mother taught her the role of a woman is to stand next to her man like a prize pony. The only way Stacy felt good about herself was when a guy told her she was pretty, because she was taught to believe a woman’s worth is determined by what a man thinks of her.

Toby would sit alone in the cafeteria doing his homework.

He spoke to no one and always went straight home. I used to think he was a nerd. A know it all. A loner. If only I had known that he had been bullied at his last school so badly that he stayed at home for months scared to leave the house. He did not know how to make friends so he tried to learn all he could, to distract from the gaping hole of not having any mates.

Sarah used to spend every minute she could listening to loud music.

She would sit alone with headphones on, drawing or reading. I used to think her a weirdo. Anti-social. An out-cast. Now I know her mother had died and her father hit and abused her. The only way she felt safe was when she could shut out the world and drown its terrors in the rhythmic beat.

Adam was the school’s skirt-chaser.

He would get the lowest grades in the school and wasn’t very nice to people. I used to think him a tool. An idiot. A stupid jock. Too late I know that he used to be one of the smartest kids in school but in a bid to become more popular he joined the school’s sports team and dumbed himself down to fit in with them. Now he picks on people who are “smarter” than he is, to mourn the talents he once possessed.

Tessa was always the loudest and the most rude.

She shouted in class and made offensive jokes about everyone. She spent half her time in detention for badmouthing teachers. I used to think her a rebel. Good for nothing. A low-life. If only I had bothered to look, I might have realised she spent her home life being ignored by her alcoholic mother and blamed for the departure of her father. She felt it was better to be heard and hated than to fade into the background.

And What of me?

I spent my time being the life of the party. I was kind to everyone except for myself. People used to think I was the life of the party. The happiest person around. If only they had seen that my smiles were a mask to hide my pain. My laughter a silent cry for help. I felt I was a waste of space. A burden. So rather than trouble others with my problems I should smile and power through.

They say don’t judge a book by its cover and never have I known it to be more true. And yet, we are only human. Our brains are programmed to do just that. Knowing what I know now, I truly wish that I could help them…

Unfortunately, I am no longer able…

Nickola Brinx

Further reading ; https://wattpad.com/user/NickolaBrinx